I thought I would write this article about the psychology of fighting and self defense which generally goes underappreciated by those looking into martial arts from the outside. One of the most fundamental aspects of self defense and martial arts that gets overlooked from the outside world is the psychological aspect of fighting.

One of the key positives that any full contact martial art will gives you, no matter which one you choose is inner peace and a freedom of fear, especially if you practice it long term. Before I learnt kungfu I had 5 years of Shotokan Karate training growing up as youngster. Back then more than 25 years ago even as a kid you were taught discipline and respect, not like a lot of the western kids karate classes that happen today which resemble baby sitting and mickey mouse clubs. 

You would compete in fighting but you would also learn to stay in 'stance' for long periods learning to push past pain and develop self discipline. This may seem extreme by todays standards and the nanny nation mindset, but personally it actually helped to develop my enduring focus and self determination. Learning kata (karate forms) without complaints of feeling tired or bored, this was the old school way of training which still resides in me today.

Fast forward 25 years later with 10 years of purely private Kungfu training on top and I have found an inner sense of peace I can rely on in the worst of situations. After all it's not your victories and good times that build your mental and physical strength in life, its your bad times, suffering and defeats that make you the character you are today.

Learning to Embrace Being Hit is Liberating to Your Soul as a Man

So now I come to the main title of this article 'The Fear of Being Hit' and going beyond such a fear which is rather liberating whether your a man or a woman. Every man or woman I don't care who they are and how hard they are started out fearing being hit, whether in the face or body. Many still are afraid today and rightly so...no one likes being punched in the face, kidney punched in the body or having the wind knocked out of them. But one thing any full contact martial art teaches you is that being hit hard is not such a bad thing and not the end of the world. You can grow tougher and you can handle it.

Practice any 'bare knuckle' martial art long enough and being hit in the face becomes not such a big deal. Karate, Taekwondo, Muay Thai, Wing Chun or any other full contact striking sport will teach you that being hit is not as big a deal as you think. One big advantage to learning any strike based martial art long term is you learn not to be afraid by being hit to such a degree that you see beyond this negative through to focusing on how to take a potential threat down. This brings a sense of peace and confidence that will stop you overreacting in potentially violent situations unless necessary.

But even beyond the initial physical confrontation, confronting the threat of physical harm teaches you mind over body that will instil a sense of confidence you can use to tackle other mental challenges and distress in your life. The life of a martial artist goes way beyond the physical into the spiritual which outside lookers will never be able to grasp and understand unless they walk such a path of hardship themselves...

Like Father Like Son...

Pictured above from left to right, my twin brother, my dad, me and my older bother way back in the early 90's at a Shotokan Karate training weekend in Blackpool

Being introduced to martial arts by my father at the age of 12 through Shotokan Karate, I was subject to competitions where I received regular bust noses, cut lips and black eyes in competition (kumite) and I am eternally grateful that he gave me this gift as a boy that would prove invaluable throughout my manhood. It may sound a bit brutal, but I learnt how to handle a punch as a young lad in fair competition that stripped me of the fear of being hurt as an adult. The gift of seeing beyond initial physical pain and into mental self discipline. A gift of learning to embrace the fear of fighting, this would stay with me into my adulthood and prove key to maintaining a strong mental spirit for every day life and the challenges that get thrown at me.